Gender-Based Violence (GBV) Crisis in South Africa: Why Emotional Healing is a Missing Piece in Ending Violence
The statistics are sobering:
Every 3 hours, a woman is murdered.
Over 50,000 sexual offences are reported annually — and countless more go unreported.
Gender-Based Violence (GBV) affects women, children, and LGBTQ+ individuals across every province, every class, every age.
We see the headlines. We mourn the losses. We hold vigils, change profile pictures, and demand justice.
But still, it continues.
At School of Hard Knocks (SOHK), we believe that prevention must go deeper than policy and punishment. It must start with healing the emotional wounds that fuel the cycle of violence.
This blog explores the deep connection between unaddressed mental health struggles and the epidemic of GBV in South Africa — and how investing in emotional literacy, safe spaces, and early intervention is one of the most urgent steps we can take to shift this national crisis.
GBV is Not Just a “Women’s Issue.” It’s a Mental Health Issue.
Most conversations about GBV focus on what women can do to stay safe:
Don’t walk alone.
Dress modestly.
Avoid certain areas.
But the real question is this: What’s going on in the hearts and minds of those who commit violence?
Many perpetrators of GBV are carrying:
Deep emotional trauma from childhood
Unprocessed grief, anger, or shame
Cultural conditioning around power and dominance
Mental health struggles that go untreated or misdirected
This does not excuse the violence.
But if we don’t understand the root causes, we will keep treating symptoms — and missing opportunities for real prevention.
The Link Between Suppressed Emotion and Explosive Violence
In South African society, boys are often raised in emotionally barren environments. They are told:
"Man up."
"Stop crying."
"Don’t be weak."
"Control her or be controlled."
By the time they are teens, many have already learned to:
Shut down vulnerability
Express pain through aggression
Confuse control with love
View emotional need as failure
When these internal struggles are never spoken about, they fester.
When there’s no outlet, no language, no intervention — the pressure builds.
And in many cases, it explodes into acts of control, domination, and violence.
How Unhealed Trauma Fuels the Cycle
Both victims and perpetrators of GBV often carry trauma.
For those who commit acts of violence, research shows strong links to:
Early exposure to domestic violence
Lack of positive male role models
Mental health issues like depression or unresolved anger
Poor emotional regulation skills
Beliefs rooted in patriarchal entitlement
When a child grows up in survival mode, without emotional support or structure, their nervous system becomes wired for fear, dominance, or disconnection.
If that pain is never acknowledged or treated, it eventually spills into relationships, families, and communities.
The Invisible Wounds of GBV Survivors
For survivors, GBV is not just a physical violation — it is a psychological wound that can linger for years, affecting:
Trust and intimacy
Self-worth and identity
Concentration and academic performance
Emotional regulation
Long-term mental health (anxiety, PTSD, depression)
Many survivors of GBV go unheard and untreated, especially in underserved communities.
They are expected to move on, speak softly, or forgive quickly.
At SOHK, we refuse to let these wounds remain invisible.
Our Approach at SOHK: Healing from the Inside Out
We believe prevention begins in safe spaces where emotions can be processed, not punished.
Our work with students in high-risk schools integrates:
Mental health literacy
Safe group dialogue
Sports-based emotional regulation
Gender identity and masculinity conversations
Lay counselling and trusted adult support
Our NxtGenMen programme helps boys unpack what it means to be a man — and offers new scripts that don’t involve violence, dominance, or suppression.
Our NxtGenWomxn programme gives girls tools to understand boundaries, emotional triggers, and how to seek help when feeling unsafe.
This is prevention. Not only of violence — but of emotional collapse.
What We See in Schools Every Week
A Grade 9 boy breaks down crying after being told he doesn’t have to be the “man of the house” at 15.
A girl who used to self-harm starts drawing again — because for the first time, someone asked her what she needed instead of punishing her.
A coach stops a fight by asking the group to take three deep breaths — and they do.
These aren’t miracles. They’re the result of consistent emotional support and safe adult presence.
That’s how change starts: in small, repeated moments of healing.
How the Mental Health Gap Blocks Progress on GBV
The truth is, South Africa cannot end GBV without investing in mental health.
Why?
Because:
You can’t change behaviour without emotional awareness.
You can’t expect accountability without self-regulation.
You can’t teach respect without giving young people the tools to respect themselves first.
When mental health is ignored:
Boys are left to fend for themselves emotionally, turning to violence or numbing as coping.
Girls are left without support to recover, rebuild confidence, or speak out.
Families remain stuck in cycles of silence, denial, and blame.
This is why the mental health crisis and the GBV crisis must be tackled together.
What We Need to Do Differently as a Society
Teach emotional literacy in every school
Every child should learn to name emotions, ask for support, and handle conflict without violence.Create more safe spaces for boys
Not just detention or discipline. Actual spaces for boys to explore identity, vulnerability, and healing.Support survivors with more than pamphlets
Survivors need consistent mental health care, not just hotline numbers.Involve men in prevention
This is not just a women’s fight. Men must be educated, supported, and held accountable with compassion and structure.Fund community-led mental health initiatives
Grassroots organisations like SOHK are already doing the work — they just need more backing.
Final Thoughts: Healing is Not Soft. It’s Revolutionary.
We’re often told that mental health work is secondary — a luxury.
But we know the truth.
Healing is not a luxury. It is the foundation of any just society.
Because violence does not begin with a fist. It begins with pain that has nowhere else to go.
At School of Hard Knocks, we are holding that pain — and transforming it into power, self-awareness, and new pathways.
We are raising a generation that learns:
How to express without harming.
How to lead without dominating.
How to listen to their own hearts — and others.
This is how we end GBV.
Not just by reacting to tragedy, but by building emotionally resilient communities before the violence starts.
Join Us.
Support our programmes.
Sponsor a mental health workshop.
Partner with us to bring NxtGenMen and NxtGenWomxn to your school.
Be part of the solution.
Because when we care for the hearts and minds of our youth, we are shaping a future where violence is no longer the language of pain.